Microphone

Before we get started, please note that I’m an audio snob. I can tell, before you even start talking, if you’ve got a good or bad mic, if it’s on a desk, integrated in a laptop or whatever. Yes, seriously I can. Let’s work on fixing your mic situation up, shall we?

Desk Microphones

Step 1: If you have a mic that sits on your desk, throw it out.

• You have to be about 2-4 inches away from a mic to use it properly. Are you going to lean over every time to use it properly?
• When you hit the desk, you’re going to send a VERY LOUD boom through the intertoobs to my ears and hurt them.
• When you look at the screen, your mouth isn’t pointing at the mic any more and you make me struggle to hear you. Don’t make me work to hear your words.

Desk Speakers and a Microphone

Do NOT use open speakers and a mic… use the speakers attached to your ears (on the headset)

• Not only are you going to transmit what you’re hearing over your speakers
  • I know there are about a dozen different narrators, but I don’t turn that setting on… I know this because I hear it through other ppl’s speakers/mics
  • Your music was great… in the 80s. I run mp3s in the background, too, but you’d never know, because I play it at 5% volume in the background of my headset speakers. I don’t assume you want to listen to Rammstein, 2Unlimited, Journey, System of a Down or Beethoven. Don’t assume I want to hear your music.
  • Wow, you like the nice sounds in the game? Nifty! I don’t want to hear you taking the elemental down cranked up to 2,000.

Hands Free vs. Push to Talk

Did you know that I have a personal life? Amazing, eh? I also know that you have a personal life. And need to do laundry/dishes/trash. How do I know this? Because you’ve got hands-free on.

• ANY background noise (music, TV, kids, screaming, dogs barking, pigs fornicating, lawn mowers) will be transmitted to everyone else in your party.
• If you’re a “big person,” you probably breathe loudly. I don’t want to hear it.
• Most of the time, you probably bang on your keyboard when typing. I hear that, too.

It may be a little complicated for you to hold an additional key whilst still pressing move keys and clicking a mouse, but please try. All the above does not come through unless you transmit voice (VOX).

The default DDO key is “F,” and is placed pretty reasonably next to the WASD keys which we use already, so it’s a no-brainer for me.

In other words, TURN OFF HANDS-FREE!

Microphone Quality

Have you done all the above and your mic still sounds bad? Do people ask you if you’ve got a loud fan/lawnmower behind you or say it sounds like Morse Code is on the line when you transmit? You mean your $3 Wal-Mart mic isn’t as good as my professional mic? OMG – ru srs?!?!

It’s because you have an analog mic. Analog is a simple plug like what you plug in to your iPod… a shaft (insert joke here) plug that’s called a 1/8″ or a 3.5mm (same diameter) is an analog plug, USB is digital.

You want digital… here’s why:

• Analog mics require the system processor to digitize your voice (and other background noise) into ones and zeros then hands that data to the DDO game client, which transmits it to the other ppl…
• Digital (USB) mics do all the digital processing directly in the headset (or in-line control box circuitry) and pass this data directly to the DDO client, nearly completely bypassing the processor (though it has to do some work to route the data, but we’re talking 1-3% of the processor strain as opposed to the analog method.)

  

  Courtesy Ron Kurtus, school-for-champions.com

Self-processing does some pretty cool stuff:

• It ‘listens’ to the background noise (case fans blowing, hard drives spinning, air circulation fans blowing on you, etc.) and plays the opposite wavelength, thereby nearly perfectly canceling the abhorrent sound out. (And now for the science: Your fan makes a certain noise. If you play the exact opposite of that noise, your ear hears a flatline.)

Analog Mics Suck!

Did you know that analog mics pick up a lot of noise that you, yourself can’t hear, but is transmitted when you speak?

• EMF from the sun, fluorescent lights. Seriously.
• Hard drives, cooling fans spinning inside your computer case.
• That fan you use to keep your body cool.
• Your A/C.
• Refrigerator.
• You get the idea?

All these things produce an ambient noise that you are used to. We are not. Don’t make us suffer those noises.

Said interference is picked up along with your voice and sent down the line to your computer and picks up the above digital noise which is converted into audible data (stuff your ears can hear) as best the audio drivers in your computer understand and think that’s what you’re trying to transmit. (Did you know fluorescent lights blink about 60 times per second? That makes an electronic noise that your mic cable picks up and transmits! That’s what the Morse Code noise is!)

Since USB mics do all their processing before transmitting data down the cable, they rarely transmit this interference.

Background Noise

Do you have kids playing loudly in the next room? A lawnmower next door? Helicopter overhead? When you’re transmitting, you’re broadcasting that sound to us. If you have a lawnmower next to you and you transmit and instantly begin speaking, we’re gonna hear some really loud noise… we don’t know to pick your voice out of it. If you know you have some background noise working, transmit for a second or two to give our brains a baseline for the background noise, then when you speak, we can pick your words out of the background garbage.

• Turn off/mute your TV
• No radio
• Ask the kids to quiet down
• Close your window so we don’t hear the cars beeping their horns outside
• Don’t let that fan blow directly on your face/mic

The Perfect USB Mic

So you understand you need a quiet environment and a USB mic. If you don’t have a USB mic yet, I’ll be happy to suggest one for you, but before I link you to it, I’ll qualify myself a bit…

• I am a voice actor and podcaster.
• I own the largest independent podcast group in the world
• I understand a lot about computers (I’ve been fixing them for more than 20 years)
• I own more than 30 professional studio and concert mics, some of them about $600 each
• I use a $25 USB headset for all my podcasts and voice work (some of which is heard on television commercials) because I have found the best mic I’ve ever used.

Now you’ll hopefully have a picture of how great this mic is

Do yourself a favor about buy the Microsoft LifeChat LX-3000 Headset. It retails for about $40, but you can find it on Amazon.com for around $25 with free shipping. I love this mic so much I literally own 1 attached to my main computer and have another one next to it, in case it breaks, I have 1 in my laptop bag and four that are brand new in box on a shelf in my office, no joke. This is the best headset mic you can find anywhere.

I do, in all honesty, have a complaint about it though: I have a huge melon for a head and it’s a little constrictive. Here’s how I fix it: Get a roll of paper towels (brand new so it has all the diameter), extend the cans (ear covers) all the way down and stretch it end-to-end over the roll. Leave it like that for an hour or two and then take it off and leave it alone for a little bit and it’s wide enough for my melon. Make sure you wear it first though, don’t just stretch it out of the box! Keep in mind it’s made of plastic and can break if you’re not careful. My wife has no problem whatsoever wearing it, so for normal folk, it’s perfect!

NOTE: When you get the Mic, throw the CD out and just plug it in to your machine. You don’t need to install that stuff.
IMPORTANT: There is an in-line box that as volume and mute controls (and something to make a call… just ignore it). If you pull on the cords connecting to the box, the little circuit box inside will sorta separate the wires from where they need to be and all you’ll be able to transmit is static. If this happens and you have a new one on order and just want to band-aid it for the time being, pull slowly on the wires and test the mic (Audacity is a great program) until you find the sweet spot. Do NOT test this live on the server as it’ll make very loud noises and piss ppl off. In the end, DO NOT PULL ON THE CORDS AROUND THE MUTE BOX and you’ll be happy!